Bowel cancer

99 Anon :2011/06/16(木) 08:47:27.54 ID:COgqGfymO

When my dog had a poo, something pink and slippery came out.

I thought he might have got a bowel cancer or a part of his back passage came out so I panickingly took him to the vet.

“It’s not a bowel cancer.”

The vet hesitantly showed me the bound used condom.....

I became more panicked, held my dog and rushed out of the veterinary hospital.....

*sigh*

I haven’t paid yet...

What should I do......

Pausing [Image]

Hiding in a closet

36 Anon：2011/05/09(月) 22:02:39

Before my husband went to work in the morning, I told him that I would stay over in my parents’ place at that night.

But something urgent came up and I couldn’t stay there so I went back home in the evening.

So I just came up with one idea that I’d hide in a closet and surprise him.

My husband came back but accidentally had an eye contact with me looking through a chink of the closet.

I thought “Oh crap, he found me...” but he quickly went out.

Simultaneously I got a call from him.

“Something is inside the closet!!!”

I told him to double-check as it might be a mistake.

And when he tried to open the closet, I surprised him, shouting “Waaaaaaa!!!”

And he hit me by an umbrella....it hurt. 

Nuclear weapon

522 Anon：2005/07/08 17:50:39 ID:LalbEqiz0

I’ve got a nuclear weapon in my pants.

I have a nuclear war every night with my girlfriend.

523 Anon：2005/07/08 18:43:26 ID:Aq7SKe970

You liar.

All you do is just nuclear experiment on your own.

No wank for exams

208  ('A`)：2011/06/01(水) 18:08:22.82 0

Approaching the exam period, I determined to not wank for concentrating on the study.

But my sex drive intensely rose up. I tried to suppress such desire and studied hard for the coming exam.

The day before the exam, mine got erected even for looking at my mum’s bras.

And at the exam day, I finished answering all the questions with lots of extra time, thanks to my effort. Since I studied hard till the late night of the day before, I fell asleep.

I woke up when the bell rang but somehow my classmates were giving a glance to me. More precisely, they were looking at me as if I was revolting dirt.

My best friend sitting in front of me turned back to me and said

“Hey, did you cum?”

According to him, while I was sleeping, I murmured “Takako” the name of the girl I got a crush on.

Apparently I said  “Takako.....Takako.....oh fuck!” and winced like being cramped for a moment.

You guys should be careful too when you don’t wank.